FRESH START - Church

FRESH START - Church

Conflict Module I: Conflict Awareness Copyright 2011 by CREDO Institute Inc., et al. All rights reserved. Conflict Module I: Conflict Awareness Conflict Is a Fact Of Life Lets make sure we know something about it ... and about our own conflict styles

Conflict Module I: Conflict Awareness - 2 Understanding Conflict Our word conflict comes from the Latin confligere, which means to strike together. Conflict Module I: Conflict Awareness - 3 Striking together two flints makes sparks

creating FIRE a source of either POSITIVE ENERGY or DESTRUCTION! Conflict Module I: Conflict Awareness - 4 Nothing is more dangerous than an idea, when it is the only one you have. mile-Auguste Chartier

Conflict Module I: Conflict Awareness - 5 Another View of Conflict Conflicts are power struggles over differences. The extent to which parties use power for dirty or fair fighting determines the consequences of a conflict.

Conflict Module I: Conflict Awareness - 6 How People Respond to Conflict in the Bible Some equate conflict with disobedience to God, like Cain and Abel. Others think its about good vs. evil David vs. Goliath, Israelites vs. Egyptians. Many think conflict is sinful, because the Bible calls Christians to be peacemakers. Conflict Module I: Conflict Awareness - 7

Why is there conflict among Christians? Spiritual commitments and faith understandings are central to our psychological identity and self esteem. We CARE! Churches profess a gospel that is volatile: - Christian religiosity acts to preserve the status quo. - Christian faithfulness acts to challenge and change it. Churches are voluntary organizations whose structures and processes allow and even evoke abuse of power.

Conflict Module I: Conflict Awareness - 8 How Do We Know Conflict is Brewing? Withdrawal, reduced participation, reduced financial giving Parking lot conversations, murmuring Difficulty making what should be routine decisions Attempts to triangle Rigid positions or ultimatums Blaming Lies Secrets

Increasing distrust Conflict Module I: Conflict Awareness - 9 Different Kinds of Conflict Intrapersonal: The conflict is within oneself; i.e., struggles between different parts of the self. Interpersonal: The conflict is between two or more persons and is related to differences (incompatibilities) between people and how they feel about each other, not what they think about issues. Substantive: The conflict can be between individuals

or between groups and has to do with facts, means, ends or values. Conflict Module I: Conflict Awareness - 10 Assessing the Depth/Source of Conflict Mines & Booby Traps Model of Conflict Objective Visible Information

Roles and Responsibilities Processes and Procedures Structure Strategies Personal Styles Goals Norms Traditions Values Subjective

Conflict Module I: Conflict Awareness - 11 Booby Traps Mines Hidden Are Your Congregations Conflicts Intrapersonal, interpersonal, or substantive? Subjective or Objective? Hidden or Visible?

Above or below the water line? Conflict Module I: Conflict Awareness - 12 Styles of Dealing with Conflict Collaborating: Lets all work together to solve this problem. Compromising: Lets meet half-way and split the difference. Accommodating: I dont care that much; have it your way.

Avoiding: Im outta here; Id rather not deal with this now. Competing or Forcing: My way or no way. Conflict Module I: Conflict Awareness - 13 The Influence of Peoples Background Individual vs. group Relationships vs. resolution Direct vs. indirect confrontation High vs. low power distance

Conflict Module I: Conflict Awareness - 14 If you havent fought with each other, you dont know each other. Chinese Proverb Conflict Module I: Conflict Awareness - 15 Are There Christian Ways to Handle Conflict? A conflict may be judged as more or less Christian

by how participants exercise power in dealing with their differences. Participants demonstrate these behaviors by: - Maintaining a non-anxious presence - Respectfulness - Assertiveness - Accountability - Seeking a larger common good Conflict Module I: Conflict Awareness - 16

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